In August 2016, I launched my first blog post here at Journal Missing Pages. I wrote:
"Did I type the word book? This book project has been years in the making, getting stalled by my fliberty-gibbet nature some would call undisciplined. THE. BOOK. That's how scary it sounds in my mind; this is a huge undertaking for a non-writer."
Seven years later, I am a published author, having completed Missing Pages: A Common Woman's Search for God's Hope Through Fractured Relationships by Nina Frost-Teller. I chose to use a pen name and change the names of everyone at the request of my children.
Throughout the long writing journey, I learned compassion for my children who had been through hell and back, and compassion for myself, imperfect and still loved by my heavenly Father.
I learned that our world is full of books and other well-written stories, and we don't need one more. But the world doesn't have my story. And that's why I plugged away, revision upon revision, wondering why I was driving myself and my DH (dear hubby) crazy with all the angst and drama.
Then we retired to the south. In the first year, our dream plans for a geodesic dome home fell through and we found ourselves living in a warehouse that had an attached 900 sq ft three-room apartment. Writing in the kitchen 10 ft off a busy road aptly named Rock Quarry Rd, noisy with dump truck traffic, was challenging, to say the least. I learned perseverance. Then our beloved Corgi, Jade, died. And I grieved with surprising heaviness.
In the second year, we found a skilled contractor who built us what we needed--a beautiful ranch on our four acres. We moved in five months ago. I still pinch myself that I live among God's green beauty in a friendly, caring subdivision.
Just yesterday, I watched the hummingbirds come and go, feeding and playing tag with dizzying speed. I stood up meaning to go inside but one was at the feeder. As I stood still, the beauty flew towards me, stopped and hovered. I heard the low-pitched hum of its wings and saw the iridescent green body and red neck ring. I stopped breathing. It flew two feet closer, curious about the tall bushy-haired object in front of it. Was I a bush, with strange bark? Amazingly, Red the Buzzer (yes, I named him), advanced two more feet and stopped. We were head to head only three feet apart. We were frozen.
As if it was thanking me for its sustenance, I said out loud, "You are very welcome friend."
And then it buzzed off. I stood still, caught up in a moment of intense gratitude for the gift of one so small.
As readers contact me with affirming comments, I am captured by God's goodness and faithfulness for Missing Pages. Intense gratitude!
Readers comment:
"Oh my goodness! Just started reading this and don't want to stop! This is the story of many of us in so many ways." ~K.
“It [Missing Pages} is hitting on so many levels and it’s so relatable to so many. I knew I wasn’t alone. I’ve cried more times than I can count. All I can say is thank you for this. I needed to hear everything that was spoken. I'm not alone in the world of parenting! Praise Jesus! ~T.
"Yes, I would recommend the book to others. I believe that [other] women could benefit from it. The things that they go through in life with family and all the issues that go with it. Mine stopped many years ago. And I keep boundaries set and I continue to grow in Jesus." ~B.
(Caution: Shameless plug) Do you want to join other readers in our Missing Pages community? Follow the link. And thank you from my intensely grateful heart. Happy Reading!
Missing Pages
Nancy / Nina
